GeekSpeak G to L

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G

GB - An abbreviation for 1 Billion Bytes (1,073,741,824) of the little devils.

GDI – That’s M$’s way of saying Graphic "Device Interface" It’s actually the graphic display system in Windows.

Geosynchronous – I haven’t a clue as to why someone asked for this one unless they are considering a broadband satellite connection. A geosynchronous satellite is one whose orbit and speed are so precisely attuned to the earth’s rotation that it hovers over the same spot on the surface indefinitely. Sounds like an extremely boring existence to me.

Ghost - see special backup definitions

Gigabyte - for what it’s worth it’s a billion bytes, How’s that for excitement?

Global Template - the template that houses all your premade automatic settings and is the one that opens when you choose a new blank document, even if you've added so much to it that it's not blank anymore.  In Microsoft Word, the global template is called normal.dot.

GUI –  It’s pronounced “Gooey” and is another one of those Acronym things. Stands for Graphical User Interface. See “Mosaic”. It is directly responsible for putting all those cute little icons on the screen of your desktop, unless you happen to be one of those who just couldn’t wait to get XP. If you’re using XP then you can just stare at that beautiful landscape and wonder where the icons went. It’s alright though, the landscape is graphical too.

H

Hackers - See Hackers, Crackers and Trolls

Hard Drive – Abbreviated HD it’s that curious little metal box inside the computer case that holds all of the stuff you install, operating systems, applications, utilities, games, everything. The curious part is, they can hold anywhere from a couple of megabytes to a gazillion gigabytes, yet they are always the same darned size. When you save something and can't find it, this is probably where it is.

HCL –  An acronym for the High Cost of Living, in computing it’s MS’s famous Hardware Compatibility List, in mechanical drawing, Horizontal Center Line, and in chemistry it is HydroChLoric acid. You want to watch that last one, it’ll put a hurtin on ya.

Heaps (as in heaps of memory) – if you’re not a programmer, forget it. A heap is the common pool of free memory available to a program (that’s what the book said).

Hexadecimal  Data Value – Holy cow, who asked that one? It’s the numerical value assigned to a character in a Hex format. It’s used in programming. Try This. Did you ever want to write  180 degrees with that funny little zero thing up there by the 0? Well type 180 and then hold down the “Alt” key and on the numerical keypad type “248”  The results, 180°.  Try holding down the “Alt” and type 155, do it at the end of a number like 50¢.

HKEY -  is an acronym for the phrase "Handle Key." We're pretty aware that in graphic applications objects have those little boxes around them you can click on to re-position or re-size the object. Those little boxes are called "handles."  However, in programming it's a whole 'nother ball game. In programming a "handle" is a pointer, sometimes called a "token" and it allows the program, in your case the registry, to contact and use other functions.  Kinda like a key to those other functions. And, here's the key, if you are not really familiar with the registry, the wrong "HKEY" can open up a Pandora's Box you don't ever want to get into.

Hoaxes –  Let’s face it, Hoaxes are lies that people send to everyone whom they might know. IMO anyone who forwards one to friends without first checking its authenticity somewhere like http://www.sarc.com  should forever be banned from that circle of friends. Hoaxes are a major contributor to the propagation of SPAM and cause more problems than a genuine virus.

Hot Fixes - That’s what Microsoft calls the download they give you when they find a major “Bug” in their software which should have been exterminated before it was ever released. It also refers to repairs made during normal operations.  AOL calls them an upgrade.

HSF - Hawaiian Sea Frontier - Heat Sink Fan (CPU cooling) - Human Space Flight - Hartford Seminary Foundation. Pay attention class, we’re gonna ask questions. Actually those are all legitimate acronyms but I think the one which applies here is probably the “Heat Sink Fan” which cools the afterburners on all those jet powered super surfers Hal Cardona builds.

HTML – Hyper Text Markup Language, the document format used on the internet. Web pages are made of all kinds of HTML tags or codes that are embedded in the text, and if you know that, why are you reading this?

HTML tags – a piece of code used to define a format change or a hypertext link. They are usually surrounded by angle brackets like <grillett> hope I didn’t say something obscene.

Hyperlink - these are the underlined words you click on that hop you from one location on the Web to another.  There's lots of them in this newsletter....click on them!

Hypertext Template File –  This is not a word, it’s a phrase and it is not in any of the references I usually pour through at great length in an attempt to satisfy your curiosity. Since hypertext is a method of linking pages and programs together (as in databases etc.,) and permitting you to jump back and forth between them, my assumption would be, a “Template file” would be a pre-formatted form for use for those purposes. But Hey, what do I know?

I

Illegal Operation – Dr. Spock and his wife Mary went to jail protesting them. They were friends of mine and I still liked them. If you or your software make a major booboo, or even a minor one sometimes, the whole setup will be “aborted” and chances are you’ll learn the true meaning of BSOD.

IMHO –  In My Honest Opinion, if I need to go any farther with this one, please subscribe to “Words for Newbies” in the unlikely event that I should ever write it.

IMO - In My Opinion, it means In My Opinion.

Import –  180° opposed from export. Means to bring a file or document from one application of a similar or different type.

Inline – as opposed to out of line? I don’t know, you sent the word in. If it’s an inline cache it’s a memory cache that lives next door to your CPU and shares the same system bus as the computer’s other subsystems.

Interface – That’s more like it, it is program or application that allows you, your software, and your hardware to meet on a common ground. WINDOWS is an interface or GUI (Graphical Users Interface.)

Internet Service Provider -ISP.  Companies who sell a complete range of unencumbered accesses to the Internet for a modest fee. One of which AOL is not any. So shoot me.

IP –  Live a little, set up a network on your computers and you’ll be asked to install a protocol. NETBUI is one and so is TCP/IP. Get that last part? “IP”  It means “Internet Protocol.”

IRQ – Interrupt Request (lines) They are actually those little metallic lines under the plastic layer on your motherboard. All those devices you add, modems, video cards, sound cards etc., need to have one assigned so they can butt in on the other devices when they want to use the processor’s capabilities. A little like the line outside the facilities at a concert. When two devices try to use the same one you have a "conflict"

ISA - Industry Standard Architecture. The long black slots on your motherboard into which you stick those sound cards, internal modems, etc., just before the trouble stops.  The short white ones are called PCI Peripheral Component Interconnect, you can either have too many or not enough. Nuff said.

J

Javascript –  A scripting language, an offshoot of JAVA but easier to use, most commonly used in web-pages. Like to see what it looks like? Open a web page, right click in the middle of it someplace and then click on “view source.”  See?

JScript –  JScript is an interpreted, object-based scripting language. Although it has fewer capabilities than full-fledged object-oriented languages like C++, JScript is more than sufficiently powerful for its intended purposes.  JScript is not a cut-down version of another language (it is only distantly and indirectly related to Java, for example), nor is it a simplification of anything. It is, however, limited. You cannot write stand-alone applications in it, for example, and it has no built-in support for reading or writing files. Moreover, JScript scripts can run only in the presence of an interpreter or "host", such as Active Server Pages (ASP), Internet Explorer, or Windows Script Host.

 

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K

Key - HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\CLASSES\.htc] "Content Type"="text/x-component"  That is a “Key” as found in the registry, under the proper circumstances known to generate foul language and cruel and inhuman treatment to computers and other life forms in close proximity. If you don’t know, don’t do. And if you do, BACK UP EVERYTHING, TWICE. Microsoft calls those yellow label numbers on the back of software packages “Keys” too. Personally I think Key West is great.  

Keyboard Shortcut - this is when you hold two keys down at one time and try to stretch your other finger all the way across your keyboard to reach a third key....all to avoid having to click your mouse three times.

L

LDAP – A dyslexic’s view of the Los Angeles Police Department.  Or it could be “Lightweight Directory Access Protocol” used to access directory listings, and is being used in e-mail programs and browsers to search LDAP-compliant directories. With its ability to provide a common means to search for e-mail addresses on the Internet, it could lead to one worldwide white pages directory. That’s what the experts say. If that is so, why can’t I find my sisters e-mail address in Wannasury Oklatucky?

Links – another name for a golf course in Scotland, or what you do to documents so that an action performed in one automatically makes a change in another. Like a sales entry in a data base changes the quantity in an inventory spread sheet.

List box - as far as I know, it's just another name for a dropdown list.  You know the box where you have this little black arrow pointing down on the right end and you can only choose one.

Listbox data - the data contained in an on-screen scrollable window. When you’re on the web and hit the wrong “Favorites” button and that space taking panel pops up on the left side of the screen, that’s a list box, the stuff in it is the Data.

Listbox items – See “Listbox data” the items are the things listed in the List Box

LOL - Don't look now 'cause this may make you Laugh Out Loud.  Actually it is such a nebulous thing that depending upon the context in which it is used it might mean most anything you wish.  Lots Of Love, is one that comes to mind, like in a flash.  Little Old Ladies, of which there are bunches here in Florida (God's waiting room)  Like it Or Leave it, offbeat but self explanatory.  Lemon Or Lime? No thank you, I prefer an anchovy stuffed olive, if you don't mind.

LPT Port - works through the parallel interface and it’s where you plug in your printer external drives and stuff for which there are no available slots on the motherboard.