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Email Etiquette
Why I Ruffle Feathers

Boy oh boy, it sure ain't easy writing email when you are a blunt, straightshooter like me.  It seems my email gets me in more trouble than anything else these days.

I belong to many email computer discussion groups where we exchange advice and help each other keep our computers running up to snuff.  I also get lots of private email asking me questions.  Now, most of these people don't know me or my style and when I reply to them, I often get these nasty return replies telling me how rude or "elitist" I sound.  Sometimes I'm real busy but see a question that I can answer, so I send off a quick reply.  No flowers or smileys....just the answer.  I think "Good, I helped another person."  Then I run off to work.

I come home, usually fried and exhausted and find an email in my inbox telling me "Well, excuse me for asking.  If you found my question so stupid, why did you even bother to answer it?"  And, I sit back and say "Huh?"

An example:

Someone asked a question on a list, regarding a piece of hardware she had removed from her computer and now she had reattached it and it was not being recognized by Windows.  She mentioned that she didn't know where the manual was.  So, I thought to myself, "This sounds like me."  When I get a new computer device, I usually put the CD software inside the manual and stuff it somewhere, once I have installed it.  So, I figured since she didn't know where the manual was, she probably didn't know where the software was either and that was what she needed to get this hardware running again.  So, I quickly fired off a reply which said, "If you don't know where the manual is, I'm assuming you don't know where the CD is either.  You need to find that so you can reinstall the software."  I even reread it to make sure it was clear.  And, sure enough, I got an email from someone else in that group telling me I was rude and elitist.  Again, my "Huh?" response was triggered.

Whenever this happens, I tend to have one of two reactions:  1.) I'm mad and decide not to even answer questions anymore or 2.) I start overcompensating all over the place and pretty soon my emails have more LOLs and smileys than content.  I kid you not.  One time I was trying to write to someone who I knew was really fragile and sensitive and when I reread the paragraph I had written, it had 12 LOLs and 4 smileys and only 11 words.  LOL

So, what's my point?  Well, I guess I'm just saying that people need to just read the facts when they read email and stop trying to assume what is behind the words and between the lines.  Some of us who spend a lot of time helping others on the Internet, do not have the time to sweeten up our messages.  Is it not more important that we get you the answer than it is that we giggle and blush as we type?

Perhaps, looking back at my reply mentioned above, I could have replied this way:

If you don't know where the manual is (becuz you often put it somewhere where you can't remember LOL, haha, :-), *wink wink*), I'm assuming you don't know where the CD is either (since I do this myself a lot and figured you might too *chuckle*, *giggle*, *blush blush*).  You need (well, you don't NEED, but it would be a good idea *guffaw*) to find that so you can reinstall the software (unless you would rather I come to your house and help you find it  <offers helping hand> *snicker* *snicker*, *kiss* *kiss*).

Would this have made the advice clearer?

LOL  haha  *giggle* <VBG> 8^)~~~  muah!!

Linda Johnson is a college instructor of all of the Microsoft Office Programs, as well as Adobe PhotoShop and Windows. She also teaches online distance learning classes in Excel, Outlook, PowerPoint, Publisher, and Word at Eclectic Academy. She has worked helpdesk and teaches and lectures at many local businesses and tech schools in her area. Support this newsletter by checking out Linda's eBooks, MS Word MAGIC!, Book I: Fonts, Fun & Formats and Book II: Table Wizardry, How To Get Started As a Software Trainer, and her newest series of MSOffice eBook Tutorials and CD