Special Definitions from Cap'n Patt, Our Official GeekSpeak Translator
(for more of his zany definitions, click here)

WHY ACRONYMS………………..?

ACRO – height, summit, or beginning.

NYM – Who knows, five dictionaries offer no reference, I do know that it is the first three fifths of the word “Nymph.” O.K. Clean up your act, a nymph is defined as a “Sprite of the woodland” or a young, incompletely developed form of an insect.

I really have no idea what it all means, I was simply attempting to find a definition of the word ACRONYM.

It wasn’t too far back when those good old acronyms were, to all intents and purposes, the sole province of Washington, the government, and all its’ associated bureaucrats. After all, their entire reason for existence seemed to be concentrated in obscuring the facts of life, and government economics, from the average voting citizen, namely you and me.

Might I say that until the advent of TV and instant new coverage, they succeeded admirably?

However, inasmuch as “BIG” business, Enrom, WorldCom, etc., seem to impel bureaucracy toward its’ goal (or is it the other way around), there is no way that the business world could let the gov’t boys get away with a rocket, or a racket, like that.

So BIG BIZ jumped on the band wagon and started obscuring a few facts themselves. They threw caution to the wind and started using ACRONYMS, most of which not even they knew the meanings.

When it became obvious that differentiation between big business and the government was becoming increasingly impossible, it also became doubly clear that “We The People” were no longer their center of interest. Confusing the people to the point of minor hysteria was their ultimate goal.

FMPOV – (From my point of view) They have succeeded admirably.

However, concurrently with that observation, up popped “Modern Technology.” Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Mike Dell, Steve Wozniak, Adam Osborne, and all the woodshed, garage shop boys, the original “Geeks” who said, “Hey, ain’t no way we are gonna let these characters show us up."

Thus was created the true world of the ultimate nerd, the geek, the techie, whatever you want to call them. Those people who really know, or at least pretend to, what the heck goes on inside one of the odd enclosures known as “Laptops, Desktops, and Towers.”

They, in all their creative endeavors have managed to take the art of the ACRONYM to its pinnacle, or as indicated at the start of this article, its’ ACRO?

Following closely upon their heels was the thundering herd. US. Those who jumped on the bandwagon, adopted the pencil holders and the Microsoft “T” shirts and began sharing our collective information on the internet.

We use acronyms! Boy, do we use acronyms? We came up with stuff like,

LOL – Lots of Laughs, or lots of love, depending upon the recipient.

PIA (or sometimes PITA) – A tenderness in the posterior part of your anatomy.

ARPIA – A real and genuine “tenderness.” Same general location.

(G) – A grin

ROFLMAO –Rolling On the Floor Laughing My A–– (anterior portion) Off.

ROFLMDO – For the benefit or our French and Canadian brethren, (and sistrens?) Substitute the word, Derriere.

OTOH – On The Other Hand, what can you say, if there’s a wedding ring, she’ married, RUN!

HTH – Hope This Helps. At least we try.

BTW – By The Way. Usually followed by something slightly unpleasant.

FUBAR – Fouled Up Beyond All Reality, Fouled Up Beyond All Reason, Fouled Up Beyond All Recall, Fouled Up Beyond All Recognition, Fouled Up Beyond All Recovery, AND, Fouled Up But Always Running (Compliments of Team FUBAR, Auto Racing) In the service we phrased it somewhat differently.

RTFM – Has to do with Reading Manuals. The second word is “The.”

TGIA – That Guy In Africa, could be a direct descendant of Lord Greystoke or one of his primate cronies, answers to the name of Eric.

YMMV – Your Mileage May Vary. What that has to do with computers I don’t know. Just thought I’d add to your options.

AFAIK – Geek Speak for, “As Far As I Know.” It just seemed appropriate.

OEM – Original Equipment Manufacturer, Old Economy Model, One Eyed Monster (Television),

SOHO – Small Office, Home Office, fits a lot of us. Or an area South of Hollywood Road in Hong Kong.

SAP – Substance Abuse Professional (is that a professional addict?) Geeks do that?????

HTML – Hyper Text Markup Language (and a file extension) Just threw that in to keep it technical.

QUANGO – Quasi-Autonomous Non-Governmental Organization, WETHTI.

WETHTI – WhatEverTheHellThatIs.

BOCA – Boat Owners Council of America. They don’t call me Captain for nothing.

SEX – Something Everybody Xeroxes. Like their derriere.

ORGASM – Oxford-Reading Global Atmospheric Spectral Model. Thought it might rekindle your flagging interest.

Then there is TIA – Thanks in Advance.

And just plain TNX – Thanks.

Reading this far displays determination beyond belief. If you would like to pursue the search for acronyms, may I suggest trying here? It’s a mind boggling experience.
http://whatis.techtarget.com/definitionsCategory/
0,289915,sid9_tax1671,00.html

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